A Reasonable Quote

In disucssing my woes over the right course of action with regards to dharma, my friend sent me this quote she came across on Facebook.

"Often people attempt to live their lives backwards; they try to have more things, or more money, in order to do more of what they want, so they will be happier. The way it actually works in the reverse. You must first be who you really are, then do what you need to do, in order to have what you want."

I like that. Thoughts?

We Have to Believe What We Know

About a month ago I posted a link to the documentary Home by Yann Arthus-Bertrand and encouraged you all to check it out, if not for the environmental message then for the beautiful way in which the images seem to jump off the screen. Today, as I am preparing for the Blizzard of 2010 to hit the DC Metro area, I was scouting around online and came across this presentation, given by Yann Arthus-Bertrand and his introduction of Home.

In the film he says "what binds us together is far greater than what divides us" and having seen this film is a true reminder of that very notion.


Yann Arthus-Bertrand captures fragile Earth in wide-angle | Video on TED.com

Another find while watching this video is 6 Billion Others Arthus-Bertrand's other project which interviews people all over the world asking the each person the same few questions:

"What have you learnt from your parents? What do you want to pass on to your children? What difficult circumstances have you been through? What does love mean to you?"

The result is amazing footage of everyday people from across the globe sharing in the same humanity we so often forget.

Whether you're snowed in this weekend or enjoying a lazy Sunday afternoon, I encourage you to take a few moments to check out this beautiful footage and give pause to consider the ties that bind.

Yoga Shoes, Really?

Believe it or not, people are wearing "yoga" shoes to class. I've seen it more than a few times while I've been teaching, and although I suppose I can understand why people might feel like they need to wear shoes, I don't agree. In fact, whenever I see my students wearing these funning looking shoes, I'm completely distracted and politely suggest they remove them. In my honest opinion, I think it is a way for some big wig who has never practiced yoga before to "cash in" on an ever growing industry, and in the end, I feel sad that people are falling prey to really good marketing.

I'm not here to judge, I'm just here to say that if you feel the need to wear yoga shoes in class, then are you really practicing yoga asana? Asana literally means "seat" or our connection to the earth. In the yoga sutras, Patanjali writes "Sthiram Sukham Asanam" (II.46) which translates to "Asana is a steady, comfortable posture." Now tell me, how can you find a steady, comfortable connection to the earth with shoes on your feet?

I did a little research and found that these shoes are made of some special material that makes you feel like you are practically barefoot. Which begs the question, if you have to buy expensive shoes to feel like you are practically barefoot, then shouldn't you simply be barefoot? Yoga was born out of nature, not out of a  gymnasium, and I think by constricting and limiting the sensations of the feet to the earth by toting these "security shoes" one is doing themselves a big disservice.

As I stated in the case of Foodies v Yogis, I think we should be mindful to uphold the 5000 year old tradition of yoga. Sure, there are a few good modern advents, but as our understanding of the connection to the earth is vitally important to the ultimate understanding of our place within the microcosm of the universe, shouldn't we at least allow ourselves to feel the earth beneath our feet?

I'd love to hear your thoughts on this and if you're had the pleasure of wearing yoga shoes in class, then please feel free to share. Perhaps there is something I'm missing here and if so, I need to know!

Health Matters

When I started this blog I promised myself I would not rant and rave about everything little thing that happened to me and I would never use it as a soapbox, but rather an introspective look at the world through the eyes of a yogini. I promised to share just enough and in just the right way to relate to all of you without divulging every little detail about my personal life.

Well, the situation has presented itself and it's time to break that rule.

If you've kept up with me over the past 6 months, then you know that I have gone through radical life changes recently, from my personal relationships to my career and ultimately, my outlook on life. However, this beautiful shift has not come without much heartache, hard work, and determination on my part to be the best version of myself I can possibly be.

So what's the problem?

Now that I'm out on my own, completely independent (and loving it might I add), I am having trouble finding an individual health insurance plan. Working for myself I have no employer benefits and although one would think it would be easy to go online, fill out an application, and find fairly affordable coverage, such is not the case for me.

Enter the PEC, aka-the pre-existing condition. Yep, that's right, I have a pre-existing health condition that I maintain through a healthy diet, exercise (including yoga), and my doctor's care. It's not life threatening and so I don't see it as a problem. In fact, having dealt with this issue since I was 14, I feel like I am much more in tune with my body and its needs and know when to take a step back and care for myself. I believe that having to deal with this issue has made me stronger and more clearly who I am today. But because of this "mark on my permanent record" so to speak, I am unable to attain coverage that fits my budget. All of the options I've examined either require an extensive waiting period or for me to shell out large sums of money that I simply do not have.

At first, this situation made me sad, and then I was embarrassed, and then I got angry. I, like many other Americans, am now forced to make a decision that could ultimately become a detriment to my health. Right now...I'm at peace because I simply refuse to feel helpless. I refuse to allow this system to drag me down and ultimately cause me to get sick again. I refuse to believe that there are no options. I refuse to believe that there are no opportunities for the system to change.

I am saddened to think that companies "concerned" with health would find it acceptable and even ethical to charge those most in need for situations out of their control. I am bothered that although I am overall a healthy person living a healthy lifestyle that those factors do not play a role in their decision. I feel judged and vulnerable, but instead of that breaking me down, it's building me up because no matter what, I always land on my feet.

I've read the articles, watched all the documentaries, but never believed that I'd be in this situation. Although I understand the business side of things, I can't understand the humanity.

I know in the end, all will work out. I will not give up and I will continue to seek out options even if that means I have to work harder and more diligently to make up the extra money needed each month. I am finding strength in every door closed and looking for opportunities to open others. I welcome your suggestions and thoughts on this subject and pray that one day this will no longer be a topic of discussion.

Ding! Ding! Ding! Your Dharma is Calling

Every now and then I get this burning sensation right at my heart center. It happens every few years and to be honest, it is happening again. I know from experience that it won't go away and if I ignore this feeling it will get stronger.

The first time I recall this feeling was in high school when I just had to take drama class and leave the world of cheerleading behind. The second time it happened was when I was in college and I was miserable studying business and missed the world of theatre terribly, so I switched majors. The third time it happened, I entered my yoga teacher training program and never looked back.

For a very long time I didn't know what this feeling was. Naysayers from my past told me it was my perpetual unhappiness that left me feeling this way. Couldn't I just be okay with how things were? I like to think it's more my perpetual disbelief that we should be miserable day in and day out. Rather, I believe it is our right as humans to be happy and I'm now astutely aware that I'm on a path to find my calling, or better yet, my dharma.

Dharma can be defined as "duty," "ethics," "work," "responsibilites," etc. Simply put, it is the purpose of your life. Speaking from experience, sometimes doing our dharma means doing what is right for us, even if it may hurt the feelings of others. Dharma is finding your rightful place in this world and living and being the best you that you can be. By pursing and finding your path, you dharma is unveiled. It takes practice, self-awareness, and little bit of chutzpah to make it happen, but if you're truly living a dharmic lifestyle, you'll never be happier.

When I am out of accord with my dharma I feel like I'm off key. Nothing makes sense. I'm angry, frustrated, and tend to be pretty withdrawn. I'm never present and anxiety runs high. It is these times when I try to reflect on where I'm at, take it as part of the journey, and continue to redefine my needs as I move closer to dharma.

I consulted an acquaintance of mine on these feelings that I should be writing, teaching, studying, and connecting more. His advice "You have to listen to your calling and if it persists, you have to act accordingly. You are a doer and one who has to act, so why wait?" These aren't daydreams or fantasies, it's my dharma calling.

He's right and that's what I intend to do. I intend to be an active participant in my life and not except others opinions as the right or wrong way. Only I truly know what the right path is for me. By meditating, going within, tapping into my practice and my breath, I create a sense of self-awareness and intuition that can only lead me to brighter days.

So what's your dharma and what are you doing to live in accordance with your dharma?

Here is a little exercise from the article Aim High by Hillari Dowdle in the February 2010 issue of Yoga Journal. (I'd offer a link, but I can't find one this morning. The issue is still on stands, so check it out!)

Ask yourself the following questions:

• What is my role in the world? 
• What are my obligations? Which ones feel right? 
• When I am serving the highest good, what am I doing? 
• Am I on a path for the good? 
• How can I best serve the world around me? 
• What would Martin Luther King do? (or insert anyone you consider as a prime example of dharmic living, i.e. Gandhi, Mother Theresa, or a family member.) 

Ancient Traditions vs. Modern Gastronomics

If you're you any kind of yogi and you haven't checked out today's New York Times, I highly recommend you do. For When Chocolate and Chakras Collide by Julia Moskin is a unique look at the meshing of our modern foodie inclinations and that of ancient yogic traditions.

The gist...

Yogi's are combing their love of practice with their love of food. Some classes now offer a foodie/yoga combination, so when you end class, you pick up fork and experience the bliss of the bite. You can read the article for yourself, and of course, come to your own conclusions, but since I am the Capricious Yogi and this is my blog, I find it only fitting to let you know how I feel.

I love food. I absolutely love every bit about the process, including the preparation, the taste, the flavors, the textures, and the joy found in a well balanced and nourishing meal. I love combining flavors and most of all I love to eat. In fact, my good friend prepared the most scrumptious meal the other day and I nearly fell out of my chair with each bite. Mmm, mmm, mmm...delicious!

Now, as you may or may not know, the vegetarian and/or vegan diet is considered the only diet appropriate for those on the yoga journey (a.k.a. the journey within). I'm way over simplifying this, but here goes...a vegetarian diet is said to leave one clean and light so that prana (life force) can flow effortlessly. Ultimately one is then clear enough to sit and meditate without distraction in order to attain samadhi (bliss).

Still with me? Good.

Enter modern consumerism and everything becomes fuzzy. Nowadays there are yogis that argue it is okay to eat meat as long as it is done in moderation and the animals are treated humanely throughout their life and in death. On the other hand, there are other yogis that choose to follow strict dietary restrictions practicing ahimsa (non-violence) towards other beings, including animals, and themselves. Not to mention the great positive impact the vegetarian diet has on the environment, but we'll save that for another day.

I totally respect and understand both sides of the story. Although, I do not think it is acceptable for our modern consumerism to disrespect this ancient tradition by making it a commodity, I find it interesting that the practice is opening up to so many people on daily basis and at a very rapid pace. Yoga as an industry ten years ago is very different from today. The practice, the clothes, the props, the music, the references, are everywhere. I see it commercials, advertising, and even on the big screen (**ahem** Avatar). So when a group of people come together to practice, and perhaps enjoy a nice meal, is it really such a crime?

The way I see it, we all have to start somewhere. It's impossible that the first time that we step onto our mats we automatically become vegan warriors, nail every handstand, save the world, and find eternal bliss. Every person's path is different, but that does not mean one is better than the other. We must try to understand that everyone has a different capacity for making sense of the world around them. If we come to our practice with empathy, compassion, tolerance, and acceptance for all of our differences, than we are already ahead of the game. It is unfortunate to admit but there are many people out there that scoff at the idea of enlightenment, peace, and harmony. Perhaps if we can relate to these people on their terms, they may be able to see things from a different point of view. And maybe, just maybe by doing so, we can come to better understand one another. Remember, we are all human and we are all in this together.

I do not think it is appropriate to judge others for what they eat. I do not think it is appropriate to judge others for what they do not eat. I do not think it appropriate to judge others at all.

However, I do think that as long as we are doing the best we can with the resources we have available to us, then we should approach a subject, such as diet, with love and understanding, and without criticism, aim to elevate and educate one another.

I say hooray for coming to class, hooray for coming to practice, hooray for building community, and hooray for experiencing yoga. Let's come together, have respect for one another and the yoga tradition, and discuss our differences to better understand ourselves and bring change to the world around us.

A Little Light Reading

Let it be known that I am currently reading 5 different books with at least 10 more waiting in the wings. I'm an official book-aholic and have been since I can remember. In fact, I love reading so much, I taught myself how to do it when I was 3!

You may be wondering why I have 5 books going at once. Well, I am the Capricious Yogi and as any good capricious being should be, my interests follow wherever the wind (i.e. my mood) takes me. I like to alternate my philosophy, with a little non-fiction, some chic-lit, a good biography here and there, finishing with books on practice.

I recently picked up Breakfast with Buddha and could not put it down. It's fiction, but it's relatable to everyday life. If you are looking for a break from the overly heady titles, but still crave a little substance, this is the book for you.